Monthly archive for October 2017

My AARP

MY AARP

 When I turned fifty I was automatically enrolled in an organization called AARP. Not the “American Association of Retired Persons”, but the “Aches And Reoccurring Pain” organization; and every once in a while my body makes me feel that I am its president. “My AARP” club is a worldwide organization, and we have more members than any other association; our motto is – “Misery loves company, and after age fifty, you are never alone.”

My free membership came with lots of perks. Aside from automatic enrollment, I also receive occasional free audio sound effects when I would get off the sofa or the floor. I have been told that this occasional array of grunts, moans and groans is quite popular among all the members; especially on cold dry days. Another membership perk that is available to all members is increased knowledge in the field of over-the-counter or pharmaceutical prescriptions and medical terms like “plantar fasciitis’, herniated discs, spinal stenosis, and rotor cuff injuries.

Ever since becoming a member these last few years I have found the best way to reduce my participation in “My AARP” was through exercise and being active. Inactivity is a sure way to be a platinum member of this club and unfortunately in today’s society it is the most popular membership group we have.
Fortunately there is a remedy available for many of these aches and pains, it’s called exercise, and it is the greatest drug ever created. You don’t need a prescription, you can take as little or as much as you want; whenever you want. Side effects include increased activity, energy, strength, endurance, endorphins, and a tendency to participate more in life.

Anyone who is a member and doesn’t want an automatic renewal in “My AARP” program, make sure you take a dose of exercise every day. When it comes to aging, George Burns said it best. “You can’t help getting older, but you don’t have to get old.”

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